Time

I had the best intentions last night to bring in the new year with a bit of a ritual.  We are moving and I spent the majority of my night, until well after midnight, packing up my ritual room, which had really turned into more of a junk room as the antics from my old Landlord made it impossible for me to open curtains, windows make much noise without him texting my partner and giving him suggestions as to what I was doing in there.  None of it was pretty or happy, however, that is all old news and has been tossed to the side.  Needless to say, all my ritual stuff is safely in boxes ready to go.  The peace of mind that this has brought about is amazing.  I only have my books to put into boxes and that room is done.  Kitchen is tonight's project, oh and the bedroom drawers.  There was no time nor place for me to perform the ritual and I"m not sure that in this place, with all that's gone on, that the ritual would have worked out satisfactorily.

I know that once I am into the place, I'll be doing plenty of rituals, the important thing, I figure, was to celebrate.  That I did, with an awesome trip over the hedge.  I applied a goodly amount of my seven league boots flying ointment and traveled beyond the hedge.  I ran into my son and we conversed about where I was going and what I was doing.  He heartily approved and bid me to continue on my journey.  As I walked the path that I so often walk that takes me to the crossroads, I had a visit from Freyja and as well from Odin.  They gave me a few portents, but mostly they wanted me to know that my choice to move was a good one, and that soon everything that I wanted would fall into place, including learning the runes and meeting my teacher.  I was told that I would be enjoying my wheel of the year, and that information that I was looking for was closer then I realized.  

My studies occupy my thoughts often.  I have already filled many pages with information I have gleaned about the runes.  I'm studying the Elder Fulwark and every day now I do a reading and note it in the journal part of my book of shadows.  I am currently learning about the various Norse Gods, and go back and forth between reading a little of the Poettic Edda and information regarding the various gods themselves.  I get excited when I study and hate to be interrupted so am cooking less and reading more.  (My round little belly thanks me).  

Once we are more settled, I'll be  heading into the green belt behind our apartment to see what kind of wild things I may find there.  I love a new challange, and although it's not a lake or a park it is a big patch of green, more wild and less traveled than the woods I have been exploring the last year.

All in all, I feel that in my own way I have welcomed in the New Year and begun my project well.  I'll continue to work towards discovering the meanings of my dreams and memories.  This year holds so much promise.

Blessings all. 

Back on Track

I started packing up my things late last night.  I don't know why I felt like I had to pack up a couple of boxes in the middle of the night, but that is exactly what I did.  It was my back room full of art supplies, 25 years worth of notebooks (filled), some fabric and crafting items like beads and buttons threads and yarns.  the items I use for worship and sacred crafting and a small selection of books.  This room held so much potential and it is a shame that I was unable to use it the way it was intended. In fact, it became a junk room with things just tossed hither and yon without a thought because the room was just so uncomfortable to be in. I look forward to my new bedroom, which will have an entry to the balcony I believe (if not there is still a window).  It will house my desk and sewing machine, shelves and my altar.  I am so excited and this keeps me motivated.

For now, this move will give me some much needed breathing space and an opportunity to find me again.  There will be no cable or internet for that matter, for I don't know how long.  Hopefully I can get that rectified quickly.  I don't care about the cable for TV though, I want to get my books back and read all the things I am behind on.  The first thing going up in that room is my Wheel of the Year and that actually might be put on the door.  I will have time to complete my task of learning the runes.  I also hope now to meet some people and talk with them about Norse magic.  I still have so many things to study, which all got lost in the push and shove to just survive being in this negative place.  I know what I have been asked to study and that communing with the Gods has become easier since I discovered my magic blanket which I sleep on nightly to keep me safe and use primarily for flying.  I think of it more like a magic carpet, and for now it works wonders.
I have been given tasks by my Gods and I want to get those down on paper and complete them in a timely fashion so I don't loose the lesson of it.  As each day goes by and the move looms ever closer, I become happier knowing that soon I will be sleeping well every night, and that shopping will no longer be a burden.  Already my life is better and I am completely satisfied with the direction it is going.  I think a Samhain move is perfect.... First thing I'll do is clean out any lingering bugaboos and work on creating a totally safe and harmonized home.

Moving and Changes

Lately I have not had anything go my way, and when I say lately I mean in the past couple of years lately.  Nothing has gone well or right or anything and I have been floundering.  I have been blaming others for my unmet desires and all in all acting childishly.  My wants and needs were not that demanding, surely I could have had a little something go my way, went my thoughts.  I have been acting foolishly actually.  I might not be getting what I want, but stuff is still happening.  I still have a life and I can do what needs to be done.... You see it never was up to me and putting my fate into the hands of the Gods is the best thing I could have done.  I am not in control, they are.  They always have been, and I might not like it, but the Gods have a reason for everything.  I will admit that moving over towards a more Norse mythology, I am more comfortable and actually hear them talking to me.

So, for now, here's the plan.  I will make no more plans, I will take what the Gods have to offer.  I will learn more about the Gods, the runes and Yggdrasil as I have been told, and I will stop jumping to conclusions about what this or that means.  At least for now until I am more comfortable with the path that is being shown to me.

I knew I would be moving, there has been so much stress with the Landlord. I think all the stress has not just got to me, but to my partner as well.  He found us a place and we move in for the first.  I have 5 days to pack, which is way better than the last time we moved.  I was told we are moving and to start packing now.  

I went out and about a couple of nights ago and was told in my dreams, by Odin no less, that these woods you have loved so dearly, no longer hold what you need.  Your new woods lie to the North.  This was before I found out we were moving.  I thought well, I must be moving into the woods, that is going to be cold work creating a shelter.  I was told mushrooms grow here, and other goodies and trinkets.  I was told happiness lies to the north, as does the freedom that I so desire.

We are finally getting away from the Landlord and his oppressive family.  We will be able to sleep comfortably, knowing we are safe.  It is a security apartment, so no one can get in without being buzzed in.  The back way leads into a serious stretch of green belt and my mushrooms are there, I just know it.  The mall, which also has a bus depot is less than 15 minute walk from the building.  I can go shopping when I wish.  I can go anywhere, any time I like.  Ideally I had wanted my freedom returned and it looks like it has come back to me.

I know it will take a while for me to reap the benefits of this new situation.  I think though, that my Samhain is going to be celebrated with the ultimate move and a cleansing of the soul. :D  What a way to start the Wheel of the year.  In it's own way, this is the best possible outcome for me to ensure that I am happy, as well as those around me. 

Blessings all.

Samhain - Out with the Old, in with the New

It's Sunday, so I'm doing my usual "tour de blog" (catching up on the blogs I missed during the week) and there was a common theme.  Samhain, the time of crossing over, ancestor worship and the ancient relighting of the hearth-fires, is also known as a New Year of sorts.  I must admit that it makes sense to have a beginning starting out on this date.  Now, when I was a girl, we celebrated Halloween by running around in costumes and collecting candy, then at the end of the evening, around ten pm we would all gather at the three-way crossroad on our quiet road and watch fireworks that our fathers put on.  There was that sulfury smell on the air and you could sense the magic if you were weird like me.  Our street bordered a forest, not a wood, a forest, vast and lush with a canyon and waterfalls, a river, trees and trails that led on occasion to a small little log cabin.  In the fall if my big lumberjack cousin was visiting we would go traipsing through there and he made sure we were always home in time for dinner.
It's now only a couple of weeks away until Samhain begins.  Whenever I go out I'm transported to other times and my memories fill me with a joy that gets me through the day.  I recall pumpkins being carved on the faux stone floors in the basement while watching Halloween cartoons.  I remember creating costumes for my small children when kids could still run around and collect the booty door to door.  The memories of reading 'The Legend of Sleepy Hollow' under the covers with a flashlight until the wee small hours and not getting caught.  From these thoughts I harness my inner strength and feel as though I am able to handle anything.
I start the beginning of my Wheel of the Year in about two weeks.  My life is full of getting rid of the old and starting with the new.  I have a new page on Facebook that only my friends know of.  I have this blog that is mine and still somewhat new.  Rest is the key, keeping focused on my goals will help me get there faster.

Samhain is coming - Woo Hoo!!

My mind just did a complete throwback to when I was young, 'Oh look, Halloween is coming!' and that feeling of magic filled me up.  I remembered the days getting shorter and watching for my dad out the window because when he got home he might have a little treat for us.  We'd go through his suit pockets and voila... there would be pieces of peanut brittle, toffees, or chocolate.  Then we would have a nice dinner, and watch TV.  You knew Halloween was just around the corner because the holiday programming started up about a week before.  There would also be the creating of the costume (my mom could sew) and the finding of a pillow slip big and strong enough to hold all the loot.  My mother was German and my father was English, neither one had any real idea what Halloween was, so what we learned was in school and we would bring the concepts home to my parents and try to get away with as much as my parents would allow.  

Now at my school we read scary stories like 'The Legend of Sleepy Hollow'.  We would cut out pumpkins, each year they became more intricate as our skills improved.  There were lectures on safe candy collecting and on Halloween day, there would be the big school assembly with a film on the perils of trick or treating gone wrong.  There was only one thing missing.... the lore.

There was no teaching about Samhain, not even any mention of it.  So this needs to be remedied.  I start my Wheel of the Year this Samhain, where I practice all the seasonal holidays of my faith.  There is so much to study, iconic imagery, ritual, food, devotion, and only a variety of holy days.  Over the next couple of weeks I'll be studying and posting some of my findings in preparation for creating my own personal ritual.  I'm excited and nervous, because I've never gone to such extremes, and it does feel good to finally practice the way I want to.  

My kids are grown, my partner now works full time.  For the first time in decades everything has fallen into place and I am getting regular quiet time so that I can do as I please uninterrupted.  Actually... it's the first time ever that I have had quiet time and everything is still sinking in.  I have time to do the artwork, study the history, and prepare the ritual, so I guess it's time to pull out my agenda and make the big transition from words to deeds. :D

The Epiphany

I was given a great gift today by my loving companion Sean :D.  I like to keep busy, but with this silly sleeping and bathroom business I've been housebound for 5 days now.  I'm getting cagey and more grumpy than usual and I kinda sit and look at my computer, look at my supplies, look at the TV, sigh, make a meal, eat and sleep.  I need more supplies to complete my projects.  It's hard to get into the head space I need to when I'm drawing because my spouse is very interactive and likes to give and receive attention often.
However today he needed him time, I could tell and he was about to not take it again, which of course makes him grumpy, I could see him eyeing the X-Box controller, and his hand reaching for it then pulling away.  I pretended I didn't notice for a bit so he wouldn't tie in one with the other.  I told him I had a bunch of craft work I needed to focus on and I hated not being able to get to it,   and handed him the controller.
With a big smile on his face he gave me my gift, when you open up Gmail there is a tab there called Site for making web pages and he also suggested that I might want to use it to set up an online shop for all my goods.  He's also going to help me with getting a Paypal account and a few other things I'll need to set up the shop, but then I'll have my own little business, something to help me retain some of my independence.  I had wanted to have everything connected and actually to go google with this venture the entire time and now I can.  Once I get a little further ahead, I'll set up a PO box and take full command of my work room turfing some of the stuff we aren't using because there is no room to cut fabric, let alone swing a cat.
Oh and when I look at exactly what the gift was, it makes me smile, it wasn't the knowledge of the website page builder that was the gift, it was that I needed it and he had been listening to me all along.  I feel awesome and well appreciated, because every woman really just wants to know she's been heard.
As for me, I've been working on the webpage all day, and I find the site builder confusing.  I'm going to be adding more and more to the site as I go, slowly adding my stock and keeping tabs of everything online. I think this is going to do me a lot of good, especially if I team it up with something like ad-sense or not... really not so sure on that one, but I will give it a look before completely dismissing it.

A Little Wand Work

I am truly enjoying the end of Mercury in Retrograde.  Being back on track is just one of the advantages.  Doors and Eyes were opened between my partner and myself that should bring an ease to what has always been a turbulent relationship.  Commitments are being kept and the atmosphere is jubilant.  I'm loving it f.  Of course I know that it will ebb and flow a bit, however the intensity and frequency is gone.  I once again have the freedom to do as I please and get things done.
This include my cedar wand.  I've decided that it should be a wand for hedgecrossing.  I have been practicing my vines and using felt pens drew some blue morning glories around the wand.  However, when I went to use a fixative on it, so it wouldn't run, it ran.  I guess I need to protect and then ink it in, and then protect again.  Luckily I can sand off the old picture and put a new one on top.  I think I need to invest in some indelible inks in green, red, blue, blue, and brown.  Looks as though I have a little research and hunting to do.  I'm good with that though.  I should have the wand done by Samhain.
As well I want to work on some more magic items, not sure what, but it will come to me.  Sean is being more amenable to heading to my Son's place so I can pick up my things.  He even has access to a truck, so I might be able to do it one fell sweep.
I think, though, if I am smart, I shall work on my business cards.  I really want to get my name out there and start getting orders in to more personalize the items towards the user.  Once again I"m dithering at the end of a strangely satisfying but long day.  Time to grab my private journal and hit the sheets.

The Wheel of the Year

It’s barely august and I’m already thinking about Samhain.  I have been reading and getting in touch with myself and my arts and crafts, the little things I do every day.  I am so bad at doing the right thing at the right time because I become sidetracked or distracted.  It’s like a curse, and guilt had always worked wonders upon me.  Finally, my partner, one of the worst offenders told me I should start saying no.  He noticed I was becoming unwell for extended periods of time and that I rarely seemed to get a moment to myself to do what I wanted to and when I finally did it will filled with constant interruptions.  He was awesome in the way he pointed it out and from that I have discovered that time is starting to slow down and that there is time for me now that I have no back in my vocabulary.  With that said I want to create a blog devoted more to the Wheel of the Year and less time on my trials and tribulations with my personal life.

Officially, the blog won’t really start until the 31^st of October, however; I will be updating, adding and subtracting various elements, until I have it stylized just right to my needs, and hopefully you too will enjoy the read.  For now, I will just let you know what I am up to and where I am headed until that remarkably fateful day occurs.

During the year, I will outline my rituals, discuss my wild-crafting travels and the goodies I pick up, my crafting and creating of magical items, my journey to find a shamanic teacher so I can get to my next level, and so much more.  I’m excited about this journey, because I think it will bring me closer to my true spiritual nature.  Hell, even my partner is backing me up, and he isn't a pagan.  I figure I have enough time to get calendars together and everything set up so I can bring them up in advance.  A calendar of events for the month, followed by that month’s magical journal, holy days, and moon phases and the antics I get up to (including pictures).  I am fortunate enough to live 5 minutes away from Westwood Lake in Nanaimo, so foraging for wild-crafting will be an amazing adventure in itself.
I am also creative and enjoy crafting of all types, cooking, sewing, knitting, crocheting, drawing and much more, and as I create thing magically, I will be posting what I do.
In other words, welcome to my magical life.